CHRONIC DISEASE UNIVERSITY: SPECIALTY CLASSES

Suffering from a chronic disease can be very difficult, stressful, painful, and depressing. Some days, you just need to take a step back and laugh. We all hear that laughter is the best medicine, and in the case of chronic diseases, there are times that laughter is the only way we can make it through the day. I have previously written an article based on this need for looking at humor in our own lives called "Chronic Disease University: Core Classes." However, here we will examine some of the possible specialty classes offered at Chronic Disease University.

Steroid Munchies 101

Many of the chronic diseases that women like me suffer from cause swelling and pain, and we are very often prescribed steroids to reduce the swelling. This course will cover the information that your doctor forgot to warn you about. When the average person thinks about steroids, they think of athletes using it to bulk up and get into shape. Well, if you are taking steroids to control issues related to a chronic disease, the idea of exercising and being physically fit is probably not on the top of your list. However, the idea of bulking up is still sure to happen anyway. What they don't tell you is steroids cause extreme munchies and if you can't exercise, that bulk comes on as fat. This course will help you avoid the munchies by finding ways to confine you and not allow you into the kitchen for late-night kitchen raids. It will also provide guidance on creating a closet organized by size; pre-steroid sizes and post-steroid sizes.

Included in the price of this course are locks for kitchen cabinets and fridge/freezer. For an additional cost, the professor can be placed in charge of the keys for you.

Organization Within the Fog 101

While this course may sound more like a class for meteorologists, it is very far from it. Many of these chronic diseases cause what is affectionately known as brain fog. I refer to it as "sometimers"; sometimes I remember, sometimes I forget. This course will cover tips and tricks to help you remember things like why you got up and went to the kitchen only to forget what you went in there for. The cost of this course includes a year supply of post-it notes for you to use as reminders wherever you may need them.

Medications 101

For those suffering from a chronic disease, medications can become an issue. While medication side effects can be a problem, this course focuses more on the administration of the medications. We are aware that many with chronic diseases must consume large amounts of medication throughout the day (My record was 36 pills a day and a shot once a week). We all know that these medications must be taken at different times (for example take this pill 3 times a day, this one 4 times a day, another one 2 times a day, etc.). Doctors make it a point to mess with us when it comes to our medications. I think they believe this is their way to get back at us for all those late-night calls with weird symptoms.
Medications 101 is a course designed to try and get your pills organized and make administration easier. This includes tips like delivering a note to the pharmacist on bright neon paper to be put on your file to remind them NOT to put those childproof lids on your meds. Asking your children to open your pills because you can't is not a good thing to have to rely on. The course also includes a workshop where you can build and create a pill organizer box that will work with your pill schedule because we all know they don't make one that will work well enough for all our pills and the different times of the day we must take them.

Living with a chronic disease is sometimes filled with many daily battles that most "normal" people can never even begin to understand. This is why I think so many of us find that there are some days when humor is our best medicine. Hopefully, this Chronic Disease University class descriptions and my attempt at some chronic disease humor gave you at least a little laugh for today. Just remember, no matter how bad your day might be, or how high your pain level has reached, take a minute to find the humor in something and maybe, just maybe, you might find a moment of relief.